For the Love of Community

Today we ventured to the Children's Museum with friends. Here are the stats:

4 adults

2 toddlers

1 tiny infant

15 minutes we were all in the same place at the same time . . . and that time was lunchtime.

We were chasing the 15-month-old. I was nursing the infant. My wonderful husband was running our son to the potty. We were playing with puppets, fake food, little tools, and splashing in the water room. I said to our friend, "I realize I would never take both of our kids here alone while they're at these stages." Our kids are 25 months (and learning to use the potty) and 6 weeks old (and nursing like a champ).

Interlude of how we got to the title of this newly founded blog. Sometimes I am a Supermom--I know just the right thing to say or do; I come up with a unique activity that my kid just eats up; I teach my kid something and he masters it immediately; I miraculously grow a third, then a fourth, a fifth, and even a sixth hand to hold both my kids, two glasses of water, a plate of food, and a box of toys, then proceed to grow a seventh hand with which to pat myself on the back. And there's the never-ending imperfection--I totally lose my cool; I yell; I give myself a timeout; I cry; I place blame; my two hands are completely inadequate; I feel lost and alone; I feel like a bad parent and cry some more.

So is this the Imperfect part that would never venture there on my own? Am I completely inept? I dare say it's the Supermom part. Here's why:

I have surrounded myself with the most wonderful community of family and friends. I have lovingly created and nurtured this community and feel incredibly blessed to have it. We try to give more than we get, but we are lucky to be given so much by so many that that would be a feat! I would be a fool to insist on doing everything myself all the time. When I had our son, I finally learned to accept help. "Can I carry that bag for you?" "Yes please! Thank you!" So the fact that I can call a friend or my mom or someone else to come with me on such an outing and hold the wee girl while I help my son get to the potty in time is ok. It's a good thing.

If we plant and tend a garden, is it ok to sometimes pick a few flowers to place on the kitchen table? I've seen the women who seem to always have it together--with a ridiculously deep well of patience, skills, smiles, and all the things we parents are supposed to have. Maybe they would say we have planted this garden solely to view through the window, and it is not ok to pick flowers. This Imperfect Supermom says it is.

So pick the flower. Ask for help. Accept the help when it's offered. And keep planting and tending your garden for the sake of the flowers themselves.